band member: hi how are you?

me: hey so we finally meet i've been waiting for this moment forever and ever do you feel the love in the air? because i do we're totally meant to be i knew it from the first time i laid my eyes on you i was thinking for our wedding we go to paris and get married when the sun is setting we should have five beautiful children don't worry i already have their names picked out lol and when we send them off to college we can buy ourselves a nice beach house and we can grow old together and own a couple of bunnies because i know you're allergic to cats and you're afraid of dogs and we can sit on rocking chairs and drink lemonade together.

band member: what?

me: i said can you sign my cd please.

band member: no i think you said-

me: cd.

band member: but-

me: please.